Understanding your Human Design Type

Your Human Design Type is the broadest aspect of how you are energetically designed to engage with the world around you. It’s the first thing we look at within the Human Design system, and it determines your Strategy; the way for you to operate in the world without resistance, become aligned with your authentic self, and “win” in life.

The following analogy, which I learned (and tweaked) from Brittany Eastman, can help with understanding your Type and how you are designed to fit into and contribute to the collective.

The Manifestor, as an initiator, forms an idea and is designed to make it happen. The Manifestor informs everyone “I’m going to go on a day trip to the forest today, it’s going to be epic and so much fun! I’m not sure how I’ll get there yet, but will work it out. Who’s in?”

The Generator is designed to respond to what comes towards them in their external physical reality. Our Generator responds to the Manifestor’s idea with excitement: “That sounds awesome! Count me in! I’ve got a car, so I can take a carload of us.” The Generator helps the Manifestor fulfil the vision because she has a vehicle that can drive them to the destination, and the key to her ignition is her excited response. The Generator also has a GPS system fitted in her car, so she has the ability to get to the destination in a focused and direct manner.

The Manifesting Generator (MG) is also designed to respond. “Yes! That sounds ace! I’m in too! I’ve got a car as well, I’ll take the second carload.” The MG has rounded up her passengers & driven down the street before the Generator is even off the couch. The MG’s vehicle doesn’t have a GPS; she wings it, knowing that she will find her way there. If the MG gets 2 minutes down the road and her car’s engine warning lights up because the motor is on the verge of dying, she’s realised that actually, she’s not so excited about this day trip now after all. At that point, it’s important for the MG to take the passengers back home so they can catch a lift with someone else, otherwise they’ll all end up stranded and no one will be happy.

The Projector is the person in the traffic report helicopter, who hovers in the sky looking down upon the road network, and with her unique perspective she’s able to see where the traffic jams are. She broadcasts her traffic report via the radio, into the vehicles of the Generators and MGs who are tuned in and receptive, offering advice and guidance on which roads to avoid and which route to take in order to arrive at their destination in the most efficient time possible.

The Reflector works at the roads authority, in the control room, in front of the wall of screens that display the live feed of all the CCTV cameras situated across the entire road network. Her computer is hooked up to all the incoming information about the road system, so she has an amazing overview of how well it’s working; she’s tapped into the general condition or health of the road system as a whole, enabling her to provide reports for the roads authority so that issues can be addressed and improvements made.

This analogy demonstrates how each Type works together in co-operation and synergy. Each with their own role to play, they have a unique contribution to make to the collective. No one Type is better or worse, more or less valuable, or more or less desirable. They’re all unique in their own incredible way, with their place in society, and if they try to force their way outside of that natural and inherent way of operating in the world, they’ll encounter resistance and struggle.

Please keep in mind, this is a basic analogy to kickstart understanding of Type. It’s not about imposing limits on what a person is capable of. It’s important not to jump to conclusions about what people can or cannot do or achieve based on Type, without a deeper understanding of the nuances of their Human Design and consideration of their unique attributes; Type reveals how we best engage with the world, but it’s such a small part of who we are as individuals.


Discover your Type by generating your free Human Design chart at www.MyBodyGraph.com


Photo by Sigmund on Unsplash

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You were born for this

You were born for this.

You are equipped with everything you need to make sovereign, aligned choices.

Now more than ever, whilst the world yells about misinformation, trusting the experts, and not doing your own research, you need to make sovereign, aligned choices.

Now more than ever, when you can get lost down a rabbit hole of information, evidence, statistics and opinions, you need to make sovereign, aligned choices.

Now more than ever, as logical, black and white, definitive, blanket approaches prove futile, you need to make sovereign, aligned choices.

Now more than ever, as you perhaps feel yourself going against the grain, you need to make sovereign, aligned choices.

Now more than ever, as you face choices that perhaps don’t feel easy to make, you need to make sovereign, aligned choices.

Now more than ever, in the face of propaganda, coercion, manipulation, opposition, criticism, shaming & division, you need to make sovereign, aligned choices.

Now more than ever, you need to trust in your own discernment, in your body wisdom, in how your soul consciousness communicates with you. Trusting in your connection to a higher source has never been more critical.

Now more than ever, as this ride gets more and more wild, you need to make sovereign, aligned choices.

Know that you were born for this.

Know that you are equipped with everything you need.

With love, from Rachael x

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A Permission Slip to Just. Be. You.

Being seen for who you truly are.

Seen. Acknowledged. Recognised. Confirmed. Affirmed.

Having your existence, the truth of the human your soul chose you to be, witnessed by another, and reflected back to you.

A beautiful thing occurs: you come to see for yourself the truths that you’ve been blind to.

The truth of the things you’ve made wrong about yourself, that you’ve tried in vain to change. The truth of things you’ve tried to force yourself to become.

You receive a permission slip to let all that go, and to Just. Be. You.

And you chuckle at the ludicrous notion that you even needed such a permission slip. That who you are could ever be anything other than divine perfection.

Human Design shows you the truth that you actually knew all along, you just couldn’t see it.

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Incensed

I’m angry.

It used to be that I could go about my business, taking responsibility for my health in a way that is contrary to mainstream western medicine, and it was nobody else’s concern. 

Contrary to mainstream western medicine that was failing me miserably. 

Contrary to regular western medical doctors who gave me no options, who didn’t explain the full implications of my various diagnoses and medications. 

I took responsibility for my own health. I discovered that there were other ways. I looked deeper, I educated myself, I sought better healthcare (rather than sick care) support. And in doing so, I reversed chronic so-called irreversible disease. All because I decided to stop deferring my health and future to an external “authority”. 

This doesn’t make me a health expert, medical expert, or public health expert. But it does give me a perspective that many – most – don’t have. 

My experience gives me a perspective that there are other ways. That mainstream western medicine can be incredible in acute care situations, but that it falls appallingly short in terms of health. That pharmaceuticals can be life saving, but come with a hefty price. That pharmaceutical companies wield inordinate power. That we must advocate for ourselves. That we must be self-responsible for our health. That prevention is better than cure, and more importantly that proactively building foundational health is the best prevention. 

This experience and perspective has primed me to ask questions about the public health measures and mandates being enforced. To look beyond the information being fed by the mainstream media, and question their motives for doing so. To question the motives and appropriateness of the government determining public health measures. To question the implications of such measures for the health and wellbeing of myself and my family. To question the manipulative tactics being employed by government, media, and authorities.  To question the rampant censorship. To learn about how other countries are managing this situation. The way I see it, this whole situation has little (to nothing) to do with health, and everything to do with politics and money.

Whilst my ego would love to debate all the reasons why I think I’m right, that’s not really helpful, it would take me a month, and it isn’t the point. 

The reason I’m so angry is because it used to be that I could go about my business, taking responsibility for my health in a way that works for me and my family, but now to do so means that simply being in public is fraught with potential judgement, confrontation, criticism, anger, hostility and objection, and the stress all this induces. The viciousness I’ve witnessed is abhorrent. The discrimination is disgusting. The righteousness is offensive. 

I’m angry, because it now takes so much effort to live my life in the way I choose without having to face this stress. I’m aware that this is a privileged “problem” to be facing, and yet I’m incensed anyway because from my perspective, the freedom to live our lives in the way we choose is being systematically stripped away for a contrived cause. Incensed because to those who think differently to me, the previous sentence is utter insanity and disgracefully selfish, and apparently worthy of being censored, for the so-called protection of others. 

Incensed because the possibility that unless we line up for the jab, we will be prevented from engaging in numerous activities, is seemingly becoming more likely.

Incensed because this whole situation ignites such passionate opposition and division, because we can barely – if at all – entertain the idea of comprehending an opposing perspective. 

Incensed, and devastated, that brilliant, experienced, highly qualified, caring experts, who have contributed so much to improving the health and lives of countless others through education on foundational health, reducing dependence on pharmaceuticals and medical care, are being censored for sharing information, backed by rigorous science, that can save lives. 

Raging because self responsibility for health is being demonised, whilst subservience, deference and reliance on government and medical authority to save us is being venerated as the moral obligation of selfless humanitarians.

I don’t know the solutions. I’m so angry, but I’m doing my best to be considerate, compassionate, and understanding of other perspectives, even when those perspectives seem unfairly critical of mine.  I must give voice to my rage, so I don’t self-combust, and so that it may be alchemised into a beautiful vision for what is possible for humanity. 

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20/20 Vision: Contagious Ascension

A vision for what remains of 2020 and beyond

He was just days old.  Our beautiful new baby boy, swaddled and sleeping soundly in his crib whilst I relaxed in my hospital bed, blissfully reverent of the miracle of nature (and a little smug despite the lingering pain and discomfort) in the afterglow of having birthed my 10lbs babe through my marvellous body.  I was also revelling in the restful lack of nagging responsibilities facing my husband and I, that would otherwise be filling our minds if we were at home, not being fed and tended to.  Suddenly, out of nowhere, the silence was broken with an unexpected, seemingly misplaced, divinely adorable sound.  Stunned and confused, my head whipped in the direction of my baby, then my jaw dropped in amazement; my newborn boy was doing the seemingly impossible: asleep, and obviously dreaming, he was emitting a fit of giggles.  Giggles!  Those sweet baby giggles that melt your heart in the way only the laughter of a small child can.  It lasted only a few seconds, but there was absolutely no mistaking it.  My husband and I were in a state of delighted astonishment, realising our bundle of joy had just expressed he was exactly that – joyful.  It’s a precious memory that warms my heart in the most profound way, knowing my baby boy was, from the very beginning of his earthly journey, beyond all logically understood capacity, joyful in his beingness.


Back at home a week or so later, I retrieved the borrowed name book from the bookcase. Given we’d chosen our baby’s name simply because we liked it, it occurred to me to look up the meaning before returning the book to its owner.  I flicked through the pages, until I found it:

Isaac: from the Hebrew name Yitzchaq, meaning “he will laugh, he will rejoice”1.


This remarkable tale makes me both smile and awe at the mysteries of life.  I love that I have such a wondrous anecdote to share, guaranteed to amaze and delight.  But more than that, I love how this experience is such undeniable – to my mind – evidence of the mystical nature of how the Universe/God/Source/Higher Power communicates with us, if we’re open to receiving. I can see how easily such an occurrence – a newborn living up to his given name in such an improbable manner – could be written off as mere coincidence or fluke, how it couldn’t be scientifically validated as meaningful.  No doubt there’s someone out there willing to burst my bubble and give me a logical explanation of why it wasn’t actually legitimate laughter or true expression.  And yet something of its incredibility, synchronicity, and mystery appeals to a deeper part of me; it fascinates me, and feels sacred and significantly meaningful, and in its way it imprinted the healing my relationship with my beautiful boy brings me every day.

A few years after this experience, I learned about the concept of “nominative determinism” from Rebecca Campbell, who describes the phenomenon as “when people’s names fit their calling or purpose in life, like little clues from the heavens.”2  It reminded me of the experience with my son, and the idea appealed to me enormously, so I began investigating the meaning behind my own names.

Rachael (given name): Hebrew for ewe, a female sheep3.

Louise (middle name): Feminine form of the French Louis, from the Latin Ludovicus, from the German Ludwig (composed of the elements “hlud” meaning famous and “wig” meaning war or battle), from the Germanic Chlodovech; Louise means famous female warrior.4  A warrior is defined as a person engaged or experienced in warfare, or alternately a person who shows great vigour, courage or aggressiveness.5  Courage is defined as the quality of bravery that enables a person to face difficulty without fear.6  It’s derived from Middle English corage, from Anglo-French curage, equivalent to coer meaning heart, from the Latin cor7; this etymology explains an earlier definition of courage: the heart as the source of emotion.8

Barker (maiden surname): An English occupational name for a tanner, derived from the Middle English bark(en), referring to someone who converts animal hide to leather using the bark of trees as a tanning agent.9  Tanning involves a process which permanently alters the protein structure of skin, making it more durable and less susceptible to decomposition, also possibly colouring it.10, 11  Another (informal) definition of the word tan is to thrash or whip.12 Barker is also an English occupational name for a shepherd.13

Stella (married surname): Italian (derived from Latin) for star.14  Dictionary definitions of star describe self-luminous celestial bodies, visible in the clear night sky as fixed, twinkling points of light.15

At the time, I didn’t have the insight to decipher and apply these meanings thoroughly, but my basic attempt was I used to be a follower (sheep), and as I matured I rebelled (warrior) and began to forge my own path toward the light (star).  And all along the way, as regularly corroborated by the many people who told me “You’re so hard on yourself!”, I was adept at giving myself a darned thorough mental flogging (tanning).

Whilst I’ve long appreciated symbolism and hidden meaning, and deep thinking has always come naturally, my spiritual path has allowed me to develop a capacity to decipher the messages available in virtually anything I perceive.  I recognise I can utilise my intuition as a guide in discerning meaning, from amongst endless possibilities, that resonates with truth for me.

Reviewing the meaning and etymology of my names, with the increased insight time and experience have gifted me, I have a renewed take on my nominative determinism:

Rachael: In the early years of my life I followed the crowd, not quite fitting in but desperate to be just like everyone else.  I was terrified of my weird uniqueness being exposed, believing it to be shameful, and so I denied and endeavoured to hide it.  I attempted to blend in like a sheep in the flock, in the best way I knew how, hoping desperately it would offer protection from my mortifying strangeness being revealed.  My efforts felt excruciatingly in vain; my peculiar physical appearance regularly drew notice and comment, I felt like I didn’t know how to behave and conform to social norms, and I had a confusingly conflicting yet uncontrollable urge to put myself within the centre of attention. Despite all efforts to blend in, I was the black sheep in a flock of white.

Louise: As I learn and evolve, I’m becoming a warrior; my strength and courage is in forging the self-acceptance to come out of hiding and speak my mind by telling all of my heart.  I increasingly recognise my need to be seen is a valid and valuable aspect of my purpose as I use my voice, distinct from the urge to be in the spotlight that was a manifestation of denying and suppressing my need.  I’m a black sheep, departed from the old flock. I’ve found my flock where I feel I truly belong, whilst concurrently owning my uniqueness as part of my power.

Barker: In the beginning, my (Barker) family of origin shepherded me in my sheep-like ways. They also gave me the gift of experiences that served to thicken my skin, and coloured much of my perception of life through familial conditioning and loving.  I used to psychologically self-flagellate, but as I spiritually and emotionally evolve I gradually depart from the habit, as I have relinquished the use of my maiden name and increasingly identified with my married surname.

Stella: I have grown to recognise my inherent divinity.  In doing so, I radiate my inner light that then guides others as they navigate their way through the dark to discovering they too possess the same divine light within themselves.


This stuff is utterly fascinating to me.  It’s not a precise science, but rather a playful intuitive exploration, and the interpretations derived are variable and dependent on the interpreter.  I could have elucidated from the meaning of Louise I’m a fighter, destined for warfare.  But that didn’t resonate; I reject the notion of taking sides, and I don’t even believe in fighting “the good fight.”  Instead I looked deeper and sought a meaning that did resonate.  The definition of star included “a hot gaseous mass that radiates energy” – that could be interpreted in a most unflattering light, so I chose not to take that onboard!  Whilst I’ve relinquished the use and much of the symbolism of my maiden name, that doesn’t mean all other Barkers are doomed in their nominative determinism – there are positive interpretations available, relevant to the uniqueness of the individual.

The point is, we all make sense of our own individual experience of life from our own one-of-a-kind perspective.  The internal stories we create through our various perceptions give meaning to, colour and inform our experience of life.  As author Andrew Holecek describes so succinctly, perception is creation.15


As I’ve grappled with the challenges borne of the global events these past weeks, I’ve yearned for relief from the uncomfortable and unpleasant emotions triggered with regularity. Whilst traversing the lows of the emotional roller coaster, a part of me is desperate to get off the unpleasant ride and move on.  And yet another part of me knows the roller coaster can’t be avoided, and there is meaning to be derived from my emotions, worthy of being understood and acknowledged rather than eliminated in a rushed attempt to alleviate my suffering.

During a recent dip, I recognised I was secured in my roller coaster seat and unable to get off mid-ride, so I would be better served by accepting what was.  I decided to sit with my emotions and observe what they were and what was triggering them.  I wrote it all out, for completeness and clarity.  I pondered the symbolism.  What did each emotion represent?  How could I honour the inherent meaning?  Each emotion was about something deeper than what appeared on the surface.  Anger was about asserting moral superiority in order to feel virtuous. Grief was about resisting what is.  Anguish was about fear of the unknown.

Giving my emotions this space and permission to be, rather than judging and resisting them, gradually reduced their potency.  Understanding their meaning made them feel valid and acceptable, even if not necessarily helpful, and therefore less painful to feel.  Sweet relief.

It was only then I was truly ready to transcend my negativity and suffering, and transmute it into healing.

I recognised we’re all living within an internally created story of the global situation.  An illustration of this point came to me in the form of this video,17 a coronavirus themed parody of the well-known children’s story book “Where is the Green Sheep?” by Mem Fox.  From what I’ve observed via social media comments, it seems there are two main interpretations of this story (though there are no doubt more).  To some, it’s a cute representation of our current experience of life amidst the pandemic, the green sheep representing the hero scientists, hidden away in their labs developing the vaccine that will end the crisis.  To others, it symbolises a sheep-like mentality of the masses who are seeking a saviour.  Same story, different interpretations.  People often don’t realise there is more than one way to interpret a story; with blinkers on, they only see the version that aligns with their views.  I’m fairly certain even the makers of this video didn’t perceive the subtext they’d created, hidden in plain sight.

I love to be precise with my words; the dictionary and thesaurus are my friends, etymology intrigues me, and I’ll gleefully be magniloquent18 if I feel it’s justified!  Also, as is no doubt obvious, analogy and symbolism turn me on, they are my language.  I don’t even care I’m guilty of mixing my metaphors, I love the magic they conjure through painting a clearer picture of the essence of what I’m attempting to convey.  Whilst we don’t necessarily think of them as such, words are, in fact, symbols used to transmit meaning.  A word is a meaningful group of symbols (letters and corresponding sounds) that represents a thing or concept, and learning language is learning to decode the meaning inherent within these groups of symbols.

Inspired by other thoughts on the symbolism of the global situation,19,20 it occurred to me I could create my own more positive story from my personal perspective.  I could redefine how I perceive this whole state of affairs and create a new positive vision and narrative that would serve me.  I could apply my own brand of nominative determinism to coronavirus.21

Please note: in no way do I intend, through this reframing, to disregard or downplay the tragedy of each individual death, the grief of loved ones left behind, the challenges faced by those suffering with severe cases, the commitment, efforts and caring of the healthcare workers, or the suffering of the multitudes of humans who have been affected in a variety of ways by this entire situation.  There are fellow human beings experiencing utter devastation as a result of coronavirus, and my heart aches for them. I acknowledge my suffering barely even begins to approach that which others have experienced, and I am incredibly grateful for my blessings and the privileged circumstances I find myself in. One person’s suffering doesn’t discount another’s; I honour all experiences, and I look towards the light from which these shadows have been cast, as a means of healing all suffering.

Corona: Derived from the Latin, corōna, meaning garland or crown.  In anatomy, the word describes the crownlike upper portion of a body part or structure, such as the top of the head.  Corona is also used to describe a crownlike appendage.  Other dictionary definitions describe a corona as a circle (or set of concentric circles) of light around a luminous body, a halo, or a luminous ring around a celestial body such as the sun.22

Virus: Derived from the Latin, vīrus, meaning slime or poison.  A virus is an ultramicroscopic infectious agent, not considered to be a living thing in the conventional sense.  Virus is also defined as a corrupting influence, including on morals or intellect.  In computer science, it’s a self-replicating program that damages or shuts down computer operations, systems or networks.23

So, what is coronavirus from my newly defined perspective?

The corona definitions bring to my mind the crown chakra – the seventh centre of the body’s energy field, located at the crown of the head, perceived by those who see energy as a luminous circle or sphere of violet light.  As such, I’m choosing to see coronavirus as contagious ascension.  It’s a global healing occurring through a corrupting influence on the morals (or lack thereof) and intellect that are at the root of the self-destruction of humanity. This influence is driven by ascension into the crown chakra where one connects with inherent divinity and oneness.  With every individual who claims this evolution, the resultant ripple effect is the infection of others through the higher vibrations being generated, healing all and shutting down the outdated and destructive paradigms now rendered obsolete as we experience this new way of being.

That’s a contagion I welcome with open arms.


So why does this matter?  What relevance does my personal perspective, intentionally chosen, have for the lived reality of what is playing out in the world?

Before I begin to answer that question, I think it’s important to consider who’s asking it.  I imagine you fall into one of three categories:

  1. You’re nodding your head in eager agreement as you read my words, because you and I are like-minded, and that’s what drew you here in the first place.  You’re fully onboard with redefining your perception of 2020 and coronavirus (if you haven’t already), and you recognise the hidden, deeper and more profound impact of conscious intentionality.  You already know why this matters.
  2. You catch my drift, and you think it’s a cute idea, but you’re not certain this is quite the sort of thing that floats your boat.  You’re open to pondering it for a bit, and you’ll consider giving it a whirl, but you’re not fully committed and there’s a good chance you’ll forget about the whole concept after a while.
  3. You’re not entirely sure how or why you made it this far through reading, because this woman who identifies simultaneously as a black sheep, a warrior and a star is a bit too woo-woo for your liking. You dwell in reality, and this redefinition business sounds like crazy talk.

Given you’ve come this far, don’t let any differences between you and I put you off.  My intention is to offer you something of value that makes meaningful sense in your world.  Your new story doesn’t need to be as flowery or esoteric as mine.  I’ll attempt to clarify the idea as logically as I possibly can, with real life examples of how the concept plays out in everyday life.

There are multiple realities

When we look at the world, we believe what we see is unquestionable evidence of reality. Ponder then, what we see is a function of the design of our organs of sight; our eyes. Other animals, with differently designed eyes, have different sight perception to humans; when looking at the same thing, what they see is a different reality to what we see.24  Additionally, various imaging technologies can show us what we cannot perceive with the naked eye. Therefore, it’s incredibly presumptuous to assume our version of what we see with our human eyes is the only true reality.  Instead of confining ourselves to our automatic perception of what we assume is reality, we can rewrite the story of our reality by selecting an alternate way of viewing.

Visual perceptions of reality

Your perception may be incomplete

Horses are sometimes made to wear blinkers, intended to control and narrow their focus to keep them on track and prevent them from being distracted or spooked.  What they can’t see is still there, but it’s no longer part of their reality.  The fun animated short film Snack Attack25 beautifully illustrates how easily we can forget there’s potentially something we haven’t seen when our focus is narrowed, and the consequences of such, particularly in our interactions with others.  It’s always worth asking the question, “Is there something I’ve missed?”

Source unknown

There is always a different interpretation available

The law is perhaps thought of as black and white, definitive, a set of enshrined rules, clear cut contractual agreements designed to ensure certainty.  Legal experts are paid handsomely to draft painstakingly precise legal documents, the more complex ones in a highly organised fashion, with the intention of effectively eliminating any skerrick of ambiguity in meaning or potential for misinterpretation.  And yet we all know legal experts are also well paid to argue the complexities in interpreting legal matters and their loopholes, often in lengthy, drawn out cases.  This example highlights no matter how carefully we attempt to approximate perfection in communicating meaning, there is always potential for an alternate interpretation.

Which story is worth choosing?

You might be of the opinion overcast, rainy weather is unpleasant; you might even describe it as horrible.  Consider the truth that a beautiful, sunshine filled day is happening concurrently with any given moment of inclement weather, except it’s temporarily hidden from view behind the veil of clouds currently spread across the portion of the sky below which you stand.  You may well have a valid preference for sunshine, but you can recognise clouds and rain have their valuable and essential place in the cyclical nature of our environment.  You have a choice in which story you live by, and my suggestion is you consider which perception is helpful, useful, and valuable; which one makes you feel better, irrespective of external forces outside of your control?  When you feel better no matter the weather, you are better able to experience and create positivity in the world.

You can’t avoid challenges – and you wouldn’t want to

Please don’t be mistaken I’m suggesting it would be useful or helpful to ignore, deny or avoid anything that arouses discomfort or negativity within you – big or small.  Recall I sat with my uncomfortable unpleasant feelings about the current global situation, intentionally allowing myself to find a way towards accepting them before I could transcend and transmute them. 

Ponder the concept of driving from your current location to a desired destination some distance away.  Your route will likely include a mix of 2 types of roadways: larger highways and motorways where you can surge ahead towards your destination with speed, ease and few hindrances; and smaller roads and streets that require you to make slower progress as you observe speed limits and negotiate your way safely through intersections, traffic control, and past pedestrians and various landmarks.  To get to your destination, you need to traverse each type of roadway appropriately.

Similarly, in life, whatever your desired destination, you must recognise along with the free-flowing good times on that journey, there will also be times of challenge that arouse negative feelings.  Attempting to barrel through, denying and ignoring these challenges in an effort arrive at your desired destination of good times sooner, is like ignoring all the road rules and speeding through the suburban back streets at 100kph – you’re pretty well guaranteed to come to a crashing halt at some point, wreaking chaos and destruction in the process.  Avoidance of challenges can be likened to encountering an accident along your route and driving on by, hoping or assuming someone else is sorting it out because you don’t want the inconvenience of getting involved.  This sort of behaviour has implications for those you’ve avoided, as well as your conscience.

Taking the time to negotiate the slower roads will ultimately show you they hold beauty that would otherwise be unseen in the blur of motorway speeds.  Accepting challenges are a necessary and valid part of the journey, that take time to be carefully traversed, means a slower journey, but your patience will ensure you arrive at your destination in one piece, physically, emotionally and spiritually.

Sometimes, road accidents are unavoidable, and we can wind up suffering injury. At these times, we can’t just get up and walk away as though nothing happened; we might need emergency medical assistance, road clean up, car repairs, time to convalesce. The necessary degree of assistance and time to recover and get back on the road varies depending on the severity of the accident. Similarly, the length of time it takes to come to acceptance of suffering in life is often a function of the degree of intensity of the emotions involved; if you’re experiencing immense or overwhelming suffering, it would be unwise to expect you could wake up tomorrow with a brand new shiny perspective, ready to move on. Patience, and willingness to seek and accept help and support is key.

Learning and practising how to appropriately traverse challenges, through the acceptance that comes with finding a way to perceive them in a positive light, provides you with a set of skills akin to having a road map that allows you to plan your journey to make best use of the freeways, enjoy the slowed scenic portions of your drive, avoid unnecessary traffic, and have an alternate route up your sleeve should an unexpected road block arise.


If you relate to 2020 as the year from hell you’d rather escape and forget, if you relate to coronavirus as a disaster and something to fear or be angry about, what does that do for your mood?  Your emotions?  Your stress levels?  Your health? How does that affect your loved ones? How does that impact your relationships? How does that affect the way you show up in your work and communities?  Does relating in this way produce positive outcomes for you and others?  Or negative?

Everything in our experience of life is subjective.  The way we perceive our individual reality impacts our thinking, emotions, choices and actions in the world.  These all have ripple effects, influencing – whether directly or indirectly – all that is.  When we perceive our world from an empowering and positive perspective, our thinking, emotions, choices and actions are positively influenced.  If we live in anxiety, anger or fear of coronavirus, we spread anxiety, anger and fear. If we live in trust and faith there are opportunities available within our chosen perspective of coronavirus, we spread trust and faith and opportunities.  It’s a deceptively small step with mammoth long reach implications.

Andrew Holecek puts it eloquently:

“We are not the […] helpless, hapless victims of the world.  We are the victims of our projections, our imputations, our hopes and fears, what we bring to that world … We can transfer that power back to ourselves, and realise that we are in fact the ones that create these versions of our hardship.”26

The circumstances of your life are not always within your control – such as with many aspects of coronavirus.  Lockdowns, mask mandates, remote learning, foiled travel plans, industry shutdowns, job loss, illness or loss of loved ones – the list goes on – these situations are largely outside of your command.  Your supreme power lies in how you choose to experience these circumstances through the lens of your perception, to then impact your response and the resulting effect.

I’ve said it before,27 and it bears repeating: opportunities for personal development, which have always been available but often go overlooked, are being thrust in our faces in 2020, as though some higher power is desperately attempting to grab our attention and initiate the next step in our evolution.  The way I see it, it’s these most extraordinary challenges we’re faced with this year that present extraordinary opportunities to evolve.

Will you see your circumstances amidst coronavirus as problems, injustices, hardships, or battles?  Or will you see them as opportunities and growth experiences?  Perhaps you will simply see them as neutral situations to make of whatever you will.  Whether you realise it or not, you’re the author of the stories of your life.  And your story impacts the larger story of the world and all that is.  It’s not about living in an imaginary fantasy land of rainbows and unicorns; it’s about crafting a vision, grounded in acceptance of what is, that sets the stage for positive, aligned action.

As Eckhart Tolle says, “You are here to enable the divine purpose of the Universe to unfold. That is how important you are.”28  The story you are writing for your life is the story of the Universe. That might sound intimidating – no pressure! – but the simplicity is you have complete creative license.  Realise it’s as simple as a change in perspective, and all you need to do is turn to face the light.

I for one intend to hold firm in my vision of contagious ascension, guiding me forward in my actions.  I trust as I do so, global healing is becoming the pandemic that shifts the world into alignment.


Recommended Reading & Listening

  • As mentioned above and per the footnotes:
    >>> Andrew Holocek: Perception is Creation: Discovering Emptiness
    >>> The Coronation by Charles Eisenstein
    >>> The Truth Virus by Kim Anami
  • Anything by Dr Zach Bush MD – I’ve listened to a number of recent podcast interviews with him which have lit me up in the most beautiful way. He has the ability to logically, clearly and passionately explain the current devastation and self-destruction of humanity, whilst concurrently imparting tremendous hope by way of the path forward being enlightened by the lessons of our mistakes. His qualified perspective is heartening. Find his statement on coronavirus here.
  • For a positive perspective on how to proactively care for yourself and your family at this time, Professor Marc Cohen (Dr Marc) has written a peer reviewed academic paper and was interviewed on the Evolve podcast with Pete Evans in a great discussion with just the right mix of woo-woo, science, and practical solutions.
  • Dr. Edith Ubuntu Chan: A Trillion Points of Light (E50) on A New and Ancient Story: The Podcast with Charles Eisenstein. A beautiful and fascinating discussion, covering altered experiences of reality, stories and perceptions of coronavirus and more.
    >>>”We live in a time now where … it sure is confusing if you look at the world outside of you and you only listen to one narrative, one perspective, and you only go into intellectual analysis and don’t listen to your heart, or only go into your emotional or intuitive states and don’t listen to logic, this is a time now where we are being challenged to integrate all those dimensions.”
  • Amy Lansky: Synchronicity and the Impossible (E02) on A New and Ancient Story: The Podcast with Charles Eisenstein. This interview took place in 2015, but it’s SO pertinent to the current global situation. It includes discussion on synchronicity, perceptions within science and openness to paradigm changes, expanding your view of reality, conspiracy and more.
    >>> “I don’t think of these other realms as nebulous or metaphorical, I think they’re just deeper forms of science that we just don’t know about yet.”
    >>> “There isn’t an objective reality out there … the basic elements of reality are not hard physical Newtonian objects but are themselves stories, narratives… there are no facts, there are only stories.”
    >>> “Things aren’t as bleak as they seem… synchronicity is just a different form of causality at a higher level or a deeper level of reality, and so the world is more mysterious than we think, which should give us hope … we don’t have to follow the prescriptions that everybody is telling us.”
  • The Power of Myth — The Hero’s Adventure with Joseph Campbell and Bill Moyers (#456) on The Tim Ferriss Show (transcript available here). A fascinating conversation about how myth and story can be a model for life.
    >>> “JOSEPH CAMPBELL: You see, this thing up here, this consciousness, thinks it’s running the shop. It’s a secondary organ; it’s a secondary organ of a total human being, and it must not put itself in control. It must submit and serve the humanity of the body.
    (Clip from “Star Wars”)
    DARTH VADER: Join me, and I will complete your training.
    JOSEPH CAMPBELL: When it does put itself in control, you get this Vader, the man who’s gone over to the intellectual side.
    (Clip from “Star Wars”)
    LUKE SKYWALKER: I’ll never join you!
    DARTH VADER: If you only knew the power of the dark side.
    JOSEPH CAMPBELL: He isn’t thinking, or living in terms of humanity, he’s living in terms of a system. And this is the threat to our lives; we all face it, we all operate in our society in relation to a system. Now, is the system going to eat you up and relieve you of your humanity, or are you going to be able to use the system to human purposes?”
  • This interview with Robin Wall Kimmera on the On Being podcast with Krista Tippett (transcript available) has a profound message about our perspectives on and connection with nature (note we are nature, as are viruses). The discussion is both scientific and magical, and covers the way in which language influences our relationship with the natural world.
    >>> “Science polishes the gift of seeing, indigenous traditions work with gifts of listening and language … What I mean when I say that “science polishes the gift of seeing” brings us to an intense kind of attention that science allows us to bring to the natural world, and that kind of attention also includes ways of seeing, quite literally, through other lenses — that we might have the hand lens, the magnifying glass in our hands that allows us to look at that moss with an acuity that the human eye doesn’t have so we see more. The microscope that lets us see the gorgeous architecture by which it’s put together, the scientific instrumentation in the laboratory that would allow us to look at the miraculous way that water interacts with cellulose, let’s say. That’s what I mean by “science polishes our ability to see” — it extends our eyes into other realms. But we’re, in many cases, looking at the surface. And by the surface, I mean the material being alone.
    But in indigenous ways of knowing, we say that we know a thing when we know it not only with our physical senses, with our intellect, but also when we engage our intuitive ways of knowing, of emotional knowledge and spiritual knowledge. And that’s really what I mean by listening. By seeing that traditional knowledge engages us in listening. And what is the story that that being might share with us if we know how to listen as well as we know how to see?”
    >>> “Tippett: Another point that is implied in how you talk about us acknowledging the animacy of plants is that whenever we use the language of “it,” whatever we’re talking about — well, let’s say this. We don’t call anything we love and want to protect and would work to protect “it.” That language distances us.
    Kimmerer: It certainly does. And the language of “it,” which distances, disrespects, and objectifies, I can’t help but think is at the root of a worldview that allows us to exploit nature.”
    >>> “In a way, we’ve been captured by a worldview of dominion that does not serve our species well in the long term, and, moreover, it doesn’t serve all the other beings in creation well at all.
    So we are attempting a mid-course correction here. And I think that it’s really important to recognize, that for most of human history, I think the evidence suggests that we have lived well and in balance with the living world. And it’s, to my way of thinking, almost an eyeblink of time in human history that we have had a truly adversarial relationship with nature.”

Footnotes & References

  1. https://www.behindthename.com/name/isaac
  2. Campbell, R (2015) Light is the New Black, Hay House Australia Pty Ltd, p.13.
  3. https://www.behindthename.com/name/rachael
  4. https://www.behindthename.com/name/louise
  5. https://www.dictionary.com/browse/warrior
  6. https://www.dictionary.com/browse/courage
  7. https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/courage
  8. https://www.dictionary.com/browse/courage
  9. https://www.ancestry.com.au/name-origin?surname=barker
  10. https://www.dictionary.com/browse/tanning
  11. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tanning_(leather)
  12. https://www.dictionary.com/browse/tan
  13. https://www.ancestry.com.au/name-origin?surname=barker
  14. https://www.ancestry.com.au/name-origin?surname=stella
  15. https://www.dictionary.com/browse/star
  16. Andrew Holecek: Perception Is Creation: Discovering Emptiness, Sounds True: Insights at the Edge podcast with Tami Simon.
  17. Nash-Gilchrist, J. & I. (2020) Where is the Green Sheep Coronavirus Edition, video accessed at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zx5SuUejlqY
  18. He he he – I learned a new word!  Magniloquent is defined as “speaking or expressed in a lofty or grandiose style; pompous; bombastic; boastful.” Accessed at https://www.dictionary.com/browse/magniloquent.
  19. Eisenstein, C (2020) The Coronation, accessed at https://charleseisenstein.org/essays/the-coronation/
  20. The Truth Virus, Orgasmic Enlightenment Podcast with Kim Anami.
  21. For the formal definition and etymology of coronavirus, see https://www.etymonline.com/word/coronavirus, and https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/coronavirus.
  22. https://www.dictionary.com/browse/corona
  23. https://www.dictionary.com/browse/virus
  24. See https://www.nhm.ac.uk/discover/how-do-other-animals-see-the-world.html and https://askabiologist.asu.edu/colors-animals-see
  25. Verastegui, E (2016) Snack Attack, accessed at https://youtu.be/38y_1EWIE9I.
  26. Andrew Holecek: Perception Is Creation: Discovering Emptiness, Sounds True: Insights at the Edge podcast with Tami Simon.
  27. The story of a law-abiding, confrontation-avoiding, people-pleasing approval-seeker who raged against the system, by Rachael Stella
  28. Tolle, E (2011) The Power of Now, Hachette, Australia.

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Ignorance is Blindness

As a layperson, I humbly recognise the limitations of my understanding of matters pertaining to science.

I recognise the value in collaborating with a trusted qualified medical professional who can guide me and make recommendations for my health.

And:

I am steadfast in my belief that being a layperson provides an opportunity to learn more.

I am steadfast in my belief that I am well served by educating myself to the best of my ability, so that I can make the most informed choices possible for myself.

I am steadfast in my belief that I am well served by asking questions of external authorities on matters pertaining to my personal health and medical choices.

I am steadfast in exercising my right, enshrined in law, to give informed consent – or not – to any medical treatment or procedure that my health provider suggests or recommends.

I am steadfast in accepting personal responsibility for all of my choices, including the choices that, with hindsight, I would choose differently.

I am steadfast in valuing and honouring my autonomy over my personal health and medical choices.

I am steadfast in my belief that ultimately, I am the authority on what is best for me.

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In support of all the irresponsible, uncaring, selfish, ignorant, stupid idiot, conspiracy theorist, crackpot, tin foil hat wearing dissidents.

So … the headline is somewhat tongue in cheek.  To be more specific, I’m writing in support of all those who are labelled as such (whether explicitly or implied), based on their opinions about the current global situation, which they have formed based on what they consider to be rational, discerning, considered reasoning. Particularly, the people who deeply care. The people who have spent hours consuming vast swathes of information, trying to make sense of it all. The people who want to know and do what is “right”.  The people who fit all these descriptions, and yet are being attacked and condemned for their views, or who keep their views hidden out of fear, because they don’t align with the left-wing phrase of the moment: “the mainstream narrative”.

Let me be clear that the point of this piece is not to argue my case, even though my stance is at least partially obvious. I’ve grappled with urges to rant and rave on social media, but I’ve held back. Partly because I’m scared of the backlash it’s likely to spark (confrontation and argument is something I tend to avoid), partly because I can acknowledge that I could be “wrong” or change my mind, partly because I don’t have all the answers, and partly because I can observe that such an urge is more about an egoic desire to assert my opinions, gain reassurance from those in agreement, convince everyone else of my rightness and their wrongness, and generally feel validated and right. A futile and worthless pursuit.

The point is to highlight that we seem to be demonstrating an unwillingness to peacefully respect views that differ from our own on the current situation. The point is to invite you to consider communicating with dignity, kindness, and respect with your fellow human beings, especially about the current global events. The point is to acknowledge that a dissenting viewpoint does not automatically equate with callousness, immorality, or ignorance.

It’s natural that emotions are intensified given the scale of this situation, and given what is perceived to be at stake. As such, it can be expected that people are impassioned in their views. And yet, it is within each of us to be capable of at least considering another’s perspective. 

We each have our unique experiences, circumstances, culture, upbringing, and a multitude of other factors, that colour how we think and feel about every conceivable aspect of our lives. What is of prime value to one person, isn’t necessarily so for the next. 

I’ll illustrate with my own example of what influences a proportion of my stance. 

The current mandates in Melbourne go against virtually everything I’ve been outgrowing and shedding for over 10 years. I’ve learned to mistrust the standard western medicine paradigm regarding health and chronic disease (with its focus on medicating symptoms rather than determining and treating the cause of disease and facilitating health)(side note: I do value western medicine when it comes to emergency care); I’ve learned that pharmaceuticals can be helpful and sometimes lifesaving, but always come with a price; I’ve learned not to be subservient or entrust my health to any outside authority (but instead to take empowered responsibility for my own health and well-being, and when necessary, utilise the support of a likeminded practitioner with whom I’ve developed a sense of trust); I’ve learned that my body doesn’t ever fail me (but is inherently geared towards self healing); I’ve learned not to ignore my intuition (and that it is constantly communicating with me); I’ve learned that lack of physical connection is devastatingly detrimental (and that connection heals); I’ve learned to let go of fear (and instead chose love). These have been deep and hard learned lessons, and so to have distancing and isolation and masks and fear and a vaccine as a desperately awaited saviour imposed upon us feels so excruciatingly and viscerally WRONG. I simply do not live in a paradigm where these actions make any sense whatsoever. And yet I’m aware that my paradigm is so foreign to the mainstream that to voice this painful perception will, based on what I’ve observed amongst media, influencers, friends and family, likely result in condemnation. The most hurtful judgement voiced regularly is that my views equate with devaluation of the lives of high-risk individuals.  

It’s worth mentioning that this isn’t a one-sided fight – there are plenty of dissidents in this situation who are just as guilty of judging and shaming their “opponents”, seemingly determined to bring them down. However, it seems, from my perspective, it is the dissidents who are overwhelmingly vilified. 

Robust discussion and sharing of views is a healthy part of life. Learning that universal agreement and approval is a fantasy, is part of growing up. But the mark of maturity is in learning to respectfully disagree.

“United we stand, divided we fall.” I suspect many of us have misunderstood  this motto. It’s not possible for us all to be united in our beliefs and opinions, but that doesn’t doom us. We can be united in our acceptance of such differences.  The division that will fell us comes from the harsh, uncompromising, vitriolic, violent judgement of each other. I know that for me personally, I can accept – albeit with some difficulty – the decisions of the government so far, even though I don’t like or agree with them. I also recognise the importance of drawing a line, of holding authority to ethical standards, and taking action when human rights, civil liberties and other critical societal matters are at risk of being violated. It might seem unrealistically utopian, and clearly this is a complex situation, but there is a way to come together despite our differences. At least, as a start, we can do our part as individuals to treat our fellow humans with dignity, respect, and kindness. 

So, to all the conscious, responsible, caring, curious, questioning, widely read, discerning, rational, informed, intelligent, free thinkers … 

I see you. 
I hear you. 
I feel you. 
I love you. 

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Everything is Perfect

Beautiful girl, it’s ok. Really. Everything is just fine, and nothing is wrong. In fact, everything is perfect. You’re exactly where you’re supposed to be. And any which way you go will be the perfect way, too. 

You haven’t failed, expectations are worthless, and you don’t need to do anything. Really, not anything. You are worthy as you are, simply because you are. You don’t have to earn your worthiness; it’s inherent. And you don’t owe anyone anything. Not anyone, not anything. Nothing at all. 

It’s ok to relax. It’s safe to trust the process. Your journey will give you everything you need to learn and grow.

And that journey, it has no destination. There’s nowhere to arrive. It’s all simply an experience. An experience filled with both light and dark. It helps to remember that the dark can always be transmuted by the light. 

You are perfect, whole and complete, right here, right now, as you are. You are so loved. Unconditionally. And nothing can change any of that. 

You are already playing your role – perfectly – in enabling the divine purpose of the Universe to unfold.  It’s incredible and breathtakingly beautiful. And it’s impossible to mess up.

Let go. Breathe. Everything is perfect. 

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What’s going well in your life?

During a recent kinesiology session, my kinesiologist asked me to share about what is going well in my life right now. I faltered, and struggled to come up with much, apart from some aspects of my parenting that I’ve been working to improve.

I’ve been reflecting on the conversation, because it bothered me that my perspective has been so negative, that I’ve been thinking that there’s something “not good enough” about just about every aspect of my life. This tends to happen when I don’t keep up my gratitude practice, or when my meditation practice falters, or any number of other reasons. I recognised that when I focus on the positive, I feel better, so I decided to write a list of all that is going well in my life. I’m pleased to say that I almost filled the page. 

I was also reflecting on all the things that I’ve been thinking aren’t going well/aren’t good enough, and thought it might be helpful to shift my approach and write a list of “what I want to improve in my life”.  As it turned out, that list was actually much shorter, less than half a page. Writing it out helped me to realise that I’d been catastrophising. 

I also realised that a lot of what I wrote, in both lists, matched a bigger list I wrote 2 months ago, of all my desires. I realised that many of my desires have actually manifested, and for the ones that haven’t, it’s much more helpful to focus on desiring them and how good their manifestation will feel, than to lament that they’re not yet my reality, which only serves to propel me onto a downward trajectory. 

It seems to be a recurring theme for me (ahem, I suspect I’m not the only one!) that I cycle through phases of feeling good about where I’m at, and feeling not so good about where I’m at.  I’m realising with greater clarity that the circumstances don’t need to change for me to feel good about where I’m at, but rather it’s a matter of focus. It can be a conscious choice, rather than a result of what’s happening externally in my life. 

I’m becoming much clearer about what I truly desire, what’s working for me, what’s not working for me, and how I’m willing to invest my time and energy. I’m learning to let go of outdated and unhelpful standards that I set for myself in the past regarding what success means and looks like to me. I’m learning, slowly, to let go of basing how I feel about where I’m at in my life, on how I think other people are judging me about where I’m at. It hasn’t been easy to let go of that one – it’s a work in progress. I’m so aware that a life filled with choices based on the opinions of others is not a happy life. And I’m aware that even if I make choices for myself, constant angst about what others think about my choices is not a happy way to live either. Awareness and understanding do not necessarily equal integration … to be continued!

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Exhibitionist in hiding

I’m noticing, with curiosity and (my best attempt at) non-judgement, that I’m in a strange place at the moment.

These past few months have seen my health improve dramatically, after a really challenging period, in response to committed effort with the help and support of my health practitioners and family. This is such a joyful relief.

As I’ve improved physically, mentally and emotionally, I’ve become inspired to write and share again, after what felt like a long period of hibernation. It feels so good.

And yet, there’s a part of me that is holding back.

I am learning to accept and embrace that I love putting myself out there and sharing. And with my words and imagery, that is so joyful and satisfying. But it’s also safe, because I can hide behind my screen to achieve this. But there is a part of me that yearns to share more – more intimately, more of me. I don’t want to hide, I want to express myself.

There have been instances where I’ve contemplated sharing a photo or video of myself. Nothing outrageous, just more me.

But the contemplation doesn’t last long. I’m experiencing a period of self-consciousness & my self-confidence is shot, because it seems that the final frustrating and baffling hurdle of my health journey is stubbornly plastered across my face for the world to see. Painful cystic acne that has returned with a vengeance, rosacea, and eye problems that refuse to be hidden under makeup. It all got too much today, and I felt sore and sorry for myself, and the tears flowed.

I’m not fishing for sympathy or reassurance (or advice!). Reassurance is useless when you don’t believe it for yourself. And I trust that there’s a lesson for me in this experience, and that working through it myself, with selective support, will bring me to a place of acceptance and healing.

I’m sharing for the reason I always do – sharing about my experiences is part of who I am, it feels good, and it might serve someone who is reading.

It’s interesting to observe how this has rattled me. I take pride in my appearance, and like to look my best, but I didn’t consider myself to be vain or overly concerned with my looks. And yet, this experience has demonstrated that when my perception of my appearance falls so far short of what I believe to be an acceptable standard, it affects me in so many ways. How I show up in public. How I feel about socialising with friends and family. How I panic when a loved one moves to kiss me on the cheek. How much I avoid interacting with strangers. What my inner voice says when I look in the mirror. And how I hide as much as possible.

There was a point when I thought that the best thing for me to do would be to overcome this self-consciousness by feeling the fear and doing it anyway – selfies, videos, just rip off the bandaid and get over it. But on reflection, I don’t think that’s what I need, I don’t think it would be helpful, and it’s just not where I’m at. Vulnerability can be a beautiful thing, but it needs to be held in a container of trust. It’s self preservation to know the difference between baring your soul in a trusting relationship compared with the local gossip. And putting my face online right now would feel like giving the town gossip flyers to hand out to everyone with the headline “Doesn’t she look hideousl!”

I’ll come out of my shell and grow my visibility when I’m good & ready. It’s healthy to acknowledge that I don’t possess the trust required to so yet. And it’s ok to be gentle with myself. I make the rules.

In the meantime, I’ll keep sharing from the heart, from behind the screen, in the way that feels good. 😘


Image by Lidya Nada on Unsplash

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